This fall season has been busy. There has been so much to do and I have felt like I’ve been constantly rushing.  I have been overwhelmed with a packed schedule, never ending chores, and looming house projects. Lately, I have simply felt tired. This pattern is draining.  As I prepared to write this post, I struggled to focus as my thoughts were consumed with Thanksgiving and all the to-dos, planning and preparations.  Then I paused and reminded myself of the goal of the holiday: a time to be thankful.  As I tried to shift my perspective and disrupt the busy day-to-day cycle, it seemed like a great time to bring back an idea from past posts: “The Little Things” and “The Little Things – Holiday Edition”, and to revisit the question of “What is saving your life right now?”

I posted my original “The Little Things” piece in the midst of the initial COVID closures, and the “Holiday Edition” during another especially busy season. During both times, I began to look for encouragement to shift my focus and prevent myself from slipping too far into a low-mood spiral.  Acknowledging that there is never a simple one-size-fits-all solution, I have found some peace when I am intentional about changing my mindset to focus on gratitude.  Prompted by Jen Hatmaker’s podcast For the Love, where she regularly asks her guests the question first posed by Barbara Brown Taylor: “What is saving your life right now?”  As Thanksgiving nears and I continue with this busy fall season, a shift to gratitude seems especially important.  I will share some of the things on my current list and encourage you to consider your own list.  What is saving your life right now?

Leaves

This is a photo of the tree in our front boulevard.  I don’t recall ever seeing a tree turn quite this color of red.  My neighbor said it is called an autumn flame. Every morning as I left for work, I couldn’t stop staring at it.  Sometimes it is the little things that take my breath away.

Activities

My family has entered the season of kids activities.  This is definitely partially a source of my exhaustion.  However, it has also been the cause of a lot of my joy, particularly when we get to watch the culmination of their hard work. For example, my daughter just performed a fall dance recital where she wore her Halloween costume and danced to a song called “Creepy Beats.” It was as fun as it sounds!  We also had the opportunity to watch my son compete in his first rock climbing competition.  Watching his bravery and persistence as he competed made me feel proud.    

Pumpkins

Every year we carve pumpkins as a family, a tradition we started the year our son was born.  This tradition was even part of a big family moment when we shared that we were expecting our daughter with a carved pumpkin announcement.  This year our tradition took a big step again as the kids drew and carved their own pumpkins.  My pumpkin is the goofy looking witch in the corner.  My “friend” told me it looks like a girl wearing a Green Bay Packers football cheese hat.  And, if you know how much I enjoy the Minnesota Vikings, you understand why “friend” is in quotation marks; our lighthearted rivalry makes me laugh. And this year’s pumpkins make me smile.  I’m thankful for the happiness this tradition brings me. 

Birthdays

This fall held two momentous birthdays that brought me an abundance of joy.  First, my Goddaughter turned 18.  I remember the day she was born like it was just yesterday. I had driven 200 miles in the middle of the night to try to meet her in the delivery room.  She was born before I arrived, but not by much.  She was the first baby of my adult life to fill my heart with more love than I could have anticipated. And, now she is an adult, a milestone I loved celebrating.

Then, my Grandpa turned 90!  We had the special opportunity to celebrate with him.  It was a birthday filled with all of his favorite things, starting the day with Bingo and ending with shots of whisky and card games.  At one point he went outside and chased my kids around the house.  I can still hear the giggles and I can’t stop smiling.  My Grandma said, “He really wanted to run with the kids for his 90th birthday.”  And, he did. This birthday was a special milestone filled with memories I will always cherish. 

Neighbors

This year marks the second fall in our new house.  Over the course of the past year we have gotten to know our neighbor across the street.  She and her husband have lived in the neighborhood for 30 years, their kids now live all across the state, and their grandkids are grown.  She has really enjoyed interacting with our kids.  Several weeks ago,  she told me about an annual tradition where she and her granddaughter craft a ghost together, an activity she offered to share with my kids this year.  She brought all the necessary materials to our house one afternoon and taught my kids how to cover their hands in modge podge and create a very cool ghost .  The craft was a perfect addition to our fall decorations and provided a wonderful memory to add to our experiences in our new home.  

Sweatshirts

My social media has been filled with people celebrating “sweater weather.”  But, to be honest, I am not the biggest sweater fan.  I find them itchy and typically not very comfortable. So, sweater weather, meh.  But, sweatshirt weather!?!  Yes, please.  Pulling on a warm baggy sweatshirt is my favorite thing to do after a long day.  Goodbye mediocre sweater I had to wear all day while at work.  Hello 20 year old sweatshirt with a hole in the sleeve that reminds me of college.  Most of my sweatshirts hold many memories which means I get to literally wrap myself up in cozy happiness, and this definitely brings me joy.

Costumes

Halloween has never been my favorite holiday.  I don’t like feeling scared, which eliminates many aspects of the holiday.  Haunted mazes, nope.  Scary movies, no thank you. Creepy decorations that jump out at you as you walk by, definite pass.  Skeletons, fake blood and guts will always get a no from me.  You get the idea.  But, one thing I have always enjoyed about this season is my kids’ Halloween costumes.  My son is now nine years old and his fun, unique, and sometimes odd, Halloween costumes have always delighted me.  When he was three years old he was determined to be a sad pumpkin.  We brought him to the store where I pointed out kids’ Halloween costumes from his favorite shows, to which he looked at me and said, “But, where is the sad pumpkin?”  I made him his costume that year, and it still makes me laugh.  Fast forward to this year, he decided to be a chicken.  He waddled and “bawk bawked” the entire evening, leaving his sister and I in fits of giggles.  A definite highlight of the season. 

These are a few of the things currently saving my life. I look forward to hearing about some of the things that are saving your life!  Feel free to share in the comments below.  

I want to end with the same quote I used in my original Little Things posts as the reminder provides me with a comforting visual.  From Bob Goff’s Living in Grace and Walking in Love: “Love is like a rhythm, like breathing itself.  Where we are taking in grace for ourselves and holding out love for others.”  When I feel my nerves rising as I continue through this busy fall season, I remember to take a deep breath and breathe in grace.  May we all fill our hearts with grace, gratitude, and joy in the little things.  

Jessica is a wife, mom, social worker, and writer.  She is co-author of the blog The Unexpected Ever Afters.

photo credit: personal photos