It is finally spring in North Dakota! The long winters here often necessitate a lot of indoor time in order to minimize exposure to the dangerous colds and frigid winds. So, when spring arrives, I can hardly wait to be outside on a regular basis again; walking on green grass, listening to the birds sing, and enjoying the sunshine warming my face. Spring brings new growth as well as a sense of fresh beginnings. Ideas and goals that hibernated during the winter months slowly peek back out as the days get longer and the sunshine and fresh air provides much needed mental rejuvenation. As I reflected on my spring season, I have found that helpful, small reminders accompany the feeling of new beginnings in this season. 

Keep it small

I have a daily quote calendar on my desk at work and this message in particular has stuck with me:

“A ship at sea can change her landfall by a thousand miles with a mere two-degree shift in her present course. You can too. You can pivot. You can change your direction. You can love what you really love and land in a place that feels more like home.” – Jeannette Encinias 

One of the biggest challenges for me to meet a goal (or sometimes even start a goal) is overcoming my feelings of being overwhelmed by the process. I am great at big picture thinking, dreaming big, and identifying changes that can have a positive impact. Honestly, some of my favorite conversations are just talking through what could make a situation better; making life better for myself and my family, both at work and at home, making life better for those in my community, the country, the world. I’m always thinking. But, in all this thinking and dreaming, I sometimes miss a fundamental next step: doing. And, the second I slow my thinking down enough to start doing, I freeze, stuck in the overwhelm. Even in spite of decades of practice implementing tools to help me work through the overwhelm, I still struggle in this area. So, sometimes I simply tell myself to “just do the next right thing.” This gentle reminder helps me to shift my perspective to the fact that little choices, decisions and actions can add up to make big changes over time. The visual of a ship at sea shifting direction with such a minor correction brought to life my reminder to do the next right thing in order to eventually make a big impact. My small, daily decisions and my big, life-long dreams are actually not that different, they are just on different ends of the same path.

Let it go

Several months ago, I had a frustrating interaction with someone I had to collaborate with. This interaction stuck with me for some time; I kept thinking not only about how frustrated I was with their approach, but how they must have felt equally frustrated with me. The more I ruminated on our disagreement, the more nervous I became about future interactions with this individual, preferring to just avoid them. Then one day, this individual handed my colleague a document, apologizing that they hadn’t brought it over for her sooner. Except it was a document addressed to me! My coworker brought it to me and shared the mix up in identity. And, I thought to myself, this person who I’ve worried about for weeks does not even remember who I am. I had been holding on to this frustration and nervousness about future interactions with this individual and they had so completely let go of the situation that they wouldn’t have even been able to identify me in a room. I thought about the amount of wasted energy I had spent when I could have just let it all go. So, my spring encouragement is that if something is taking up space or draining your energy that is unnecessary or maybe even untrue, let it go. And remember, the other person may already have. 

Listen

In April, I had the opportunity to attend a conference about restorative practices. I spent two days in an intensive “circle keeper” training. The goal of this restorative practice’s circle is to create a “carefully constructed, intentional dialogue space” with the focus on listening and truly hearing one another without interruption. Creating this type of space creates relationship and builds empathy. Throughout the training, we spent much of the time practicing the skills required for such intentional listening. After spending two days focused on listening to others, I felt refreshed and a sense of calm. I thought about how I could incorporate aspects of intentional listening into more of my daily life. Listening to understand, not listening to respond. I shared what I had learned in my training with a colleague who reflected,

“Considering the time we are currently living in, listening might be the most important thing of all.”

I agree. As the trees bud and the grass turns green, I am attempting to slow down, taking the time to listen to those around me. 

Go outside

I end this post with a favorite springtime activity: Go outside. My daughter tells me often, “outside is the best side,” and I think we could all use a little “best side” these days. So I encourage you to go out…sit in the sunshine, look at the new leaves forming on the trees, and listen to the birds as they sing. It’s been a long winter with the doors and windows shut, hellos muffled through thick scarfs, mitten waves seen through closed car windows. Welcome people back with a smile and warm hello. Enjoy watching the kids fly by on their bikes, people walking their dogs, neighbors mowing their lawns. We’re all still here, living in community. Welcome back spring. Welcome again new beginnings. 

Jessica is a wife, mom, social worker, and writer.  She is co-author of the blog The Unexpected Ever Afters.